There is very little in this world more destructive than blame, and it is sure to derail your progress. We all fall into the trap of blaming circumstances, situations, ourselves or other people when we fall short of the mark. Do these examples sound familiar:-“It was the festive season, I had no choice but to over indulge, I couldn’t be a stick in the mud….” Or, I will start an exercise programme when my financial situation improves.” Or …“I hate myself for being so weak!” … Or “I have no time for gym.” … Or “My mom always said I was clumsy, so, she’s to blame for my lack of exercise and weight problems”. The reality is that ultimately your success or lack there of boils down to your decision to take an action, be it possitive or negative.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not undermining the challenges and the hard work that may lie ahead to let go of blame, and that people and circumstances may have caused real pain. The reality is however, that successful people don’t blame. Be it in business, relationships, or lifestyle choices, everyone that I know who is successful is able to acknowledge the challenges of the circumstances they find themselves in and the problems created by themselves, others or situations, learn from them, and take accountability for their own actions moving forward.
So, from today onwards, do something, however small to let go of blame, whether that requires the support of friends, this community, or professionals, or just being mindful that we hold all the cards- we have power over our own decisions and destiny, nothing can rob us of that power unless we choose to allow it to. If you find yourself saying, I had to eat the pie and chips because there was nothing else to eat, stop and remind yourself that eating the pie and chips was your choice, nothing more, nothing less-own it-it’s an empowering first step!
And on that note, let’s stop blaming ourselves, that’s only going to reinforce a negative self-image and give you an excuse to fail! Acknowledge when you may have let yourself down, (but don’t beat yourself up about it), hell, you’re only human. Learn from your mistakes, do it differently next time, pick yourself up and keep doing the best you can.
Finally, remember, baby steps:- change doesn’t happen over night, consistently making small changes over time, forming new habits slowly will, in good time snowball into something amazing.